Who The Fuck Are You?

It is kinda inevitable that when a new authority figure arrives, there is a sense of hope that somehow this will result in things improving. Especially if the new guy was a popular personality previously. And that's how we fool ourselves. 

You see, it's very difficult for one person to change the system for the better compared to how easy it is for the system to change that person for the worse. 

Fool Me Twice, Shame On Me

I've already gone on about how I was failed in final year practicals in one of the most ridiculous ways you could imagine. Considering what happened there, you'd have thought I'd have gotten the hell out of that place the moment my internship concluded. But that sort of common sense eludes me from time to time. 

So Madam Vice Principal called me and said there was an opening in the casualty and they needed me to help out because they were struggling to find enough people to join (gee, I wonder why). 

I guess I agreed because trying to find a job after MBBS is not easy. You won't really have a good idea where to start. I also didn't have the time/money to do patient job-hunting. So I decided to go with the easy, safe option of joining my own college as a non-academic junior resident (not that there were any acad JRs mind you). 

Some of the professors who taught also advised me to do this because of how precarious my finances were trying to take care of my father. And I guess in a stupid way, I still kinda trusted some of the people there a little more than I should have considering what happened only around a year earlier. 

A Good Enough Start

First few months working there was alright. Transition to medical officer at my own college was pretty easy transition. When I was an intern, we did most of the work dealing with patients because of staff shortage so it wasn't as hard as it might have been otherwise. I knew all the staff well and got along with all of them perfectly. 

But it all changed after a couple of months. Initially, they were paying me daily. They then changed it to monthly. But another person who was also taking duties there was getting paid daily. I should've gotten the hint then that it was probably time to find a new job but I didn't. 

By the way, if you're wondering what the hell is up with these weird payment structures, welcome to my college. Everything was weird and very little made sense even at the best of times. 

So after about 3 months, they stopped paying me. This put me in a dilemma. Should I stay on and hope they give me my pending salary? Or do I cut my losses and leave knowing that once I go, the chances of me getting my pending salary was close to nonexistent. After being given some encouragement by some senior docs in my department, I decided to continue and hope I get paid eventually. In the meantime, I would go to other hospitals in my free time so that I could still pay the month's bills. 

"You're Working Here Thanks to Our Mercy"

In the coming months, I would be given repeated hints that I should probably walk out the door. 

The time came to vacate my old room I'd been given way back at the start of internship for the new batch to come. I'd seen an opening with this. I told them I'd vacate as soon I get paid what I was owed. 

What happened in the end was that the hostel warden used some of my juniors to break into my room without my knowledge. I found out later on and was not pleased to say the least. 

So I went to speak with Madam Vice Principal and some of her "assistants" about this. My tone was perhaps not as polite as I usually would be but what else do you expect after not being paid for months and having this shit being done behind your back. The reply I got was quite memorable. 

"You should be grateful we let you work here at all. You're working here because of our mercy."

Now remember, *they asked me* to join months ago and now they're telling me I should be grateful to continue working the most hours/month of any doctor in the entire hospital and still not get paid. 

After this, I held a lot of grudge against them for a while. Eventually, I got an NRHM post at a Taluk Hospital and left. I wasn't paid for the last 5-6 months. 

Can I At Least Get a Certificate? 😕

After I'd left, I'd basically given up all hope of getting paid whatever I was owed. But I still wanted an experience certificate for the time that I'd worked there. Experience working in a medical college would come in handy sometime in the future I figured. To get this, I had to get a request approved by our Principal, Professor Highpants. But even this ended up being way more problematic than I imagined. 

You see there is way to get requests approved at my colleges and it's probably best explained by this flowchart. 

Professor Highpants became Principal around a year back and there was a lot of expectation among students that he'd do a lot to improve things in campus. Boy oh boy, were we wrong about that. He not only couldn't care less about any needs of the students but would also deal with them in an obnoxious manner that left a bad taste in everyone's mouths. 

Highpants made me run around the whole college whenever I got the time from the other place I worked. 

"There is no evidence that you ever worked here," he said. Just the kind of thing you want to hear after working the most hours in the hospital for several months without pay. 🙄

Let's be clear here. Highpants knew well who I was and that I was working here since many months. Initially I figured this must be some ego-clash between him and Madam VP because she was the one who gave the job in the first place. 

He told me to get a written statement that I had actually worked here signed by various faculty. After weeks of running around and getting all this done, the reply I got from Highpants was,

"I'm too scared to sign anything for you, sorry."

Imagine being in your 70s, the Principal of a Medical College and still be so stripped of actual power that you can't even sign a harmless certificate for one of your former students. I didn't even ask for the money anymore, I just needed a certificate. Was that really too much? And why make me run around so much if you weren't ever going to make it happen?

I Scratch Your Back, You'll Scratch Mine

Months later, somewhat unexpectedly, I did get the experience certificate. Apparently Madam VP thought it might be time to hire me short-term again. 

"You'll help us when it is time, ok?"

Thankfully, it never really came to that. I got the certificate and never had to work for them again. But the whole episode still leaves a bad taste in the mouth. 

Couple of years later, I was given a small memento by my juniors for reaching AIIMS. It was presented by Principal Highpants himself. I was surprised he didn't ask for an affidavit signed by 10 people to prove I even studied there. 

Lessons Learnt a Little too Late 

I guess the big lesson out of all this is that staying in your comfort zone even when you know it'd probably be for the worse long-term is not a great idea. Even if people around you tell different. 

People who hurt you once will likely hurt you again without hesitation. The scorpion only knows how to sting. But that is a lesson I'm still struggling to apply in life to this day.